After 17 years of working in the corporate world, I finally
made up my mind to take a break from my professional responsibilities. It was not at all an easy decision but had to be
taken all the same, for several reasons. I wound up my responsibilities at work and
became a full time home-maker. The first 2 months in this role were just
perfect, when people started telling me how relaxed and happy I looked. It was
a compliment indeed and I am sure my husband was happy to see me relax - something
he has wanted me to do for a long while now.
But it became evident to me very soon, that although I was
home, I could not stop this mind of mine from thinking, observing, gathering
information, analysing things around me. So many years of work had ensured that
my brain and mind would not be happy just relaxing and although I was out of
the workforce, I had to be productive in my own eyes - for myself!
After taking it easy for 2 months, I realised that there was
just so much to do at home. How did I manage this all for all these years, when
I was away at work? I stretched and stressed myself, I compromised on so many
things for my family and myself. But then most of us women and even men make
these compromises, when we have to do what we HAVE to do. Even the traditional
housewife who has been at home forever has perhaps compromised on so many of
her ambitions or wishes either for the family or as a conscious decision to
give her best to the family.
Then it struck me, that for a first few years after I had my
son, I had some very good domestic help round the clock in addition to family
support. And that indeed took so much burden off me.
My dear maid Malti-She
made so many parts of my life easy before she got married off and settled in
her own sweet life of domesticity. I never had any maid who was able to match
her abilities. Her departure was the start to my struggles in balancing a
successful corporate life and keeping my home the way I loved it. But that
struggle is over for now.
In my current bliss, I keep observing this maid community –
Each of them a woman just like me – with a family to take care of and
responsibilities at work. The biggest difference between “the maid”(replace any
name with another) and me was that while I had a stable happy life with all
good things and loving people in abundance - her life was a misery! Their typical story was that she was the sole
earning member of her house while her husband wasted away his precious life
drinking and dreaming of bigger things, which he would force her to buy him. She has children to raise, a husband to battle
on a daily basis, battle the economics on running the show with the money she makes.
And so many other survival related problems- some we can’t even begin to imagine.
Very pitiful condition to say the least!
The more I observed, the more I began to sympathize with her
plight. I would often observe that most of them worked from dawn to dusk but
never felt the need to carry a lunch box for themselves. I decided that I would
try to give my maid a small meal on one pretext or the other just so that she
doesn’t go hungry all through the day. I started doing that. On one day it was
a cup of tea and biscuits then a glass of milk another day. Then on another day1
she ate the rotis and vegetable that I gave her but refused food on day2. I
asked her why to which she promptly told me that she was fasting on the name of
some GOD or Goddess. Then the next day she said she was fasting again for
another God. She could and would eat only on day 4!( and that too I am sure,
that she would eat if I gave her anything to eat at all else would go hungry- a
price she was paying for bearing 5 children who needed to be fed). Now this really got to me. These women who
slogged day after day physically, could not survive like this for long. I felt
so angry, helpless that no matter how much I did for her, it was definitely not
enough.
So I tried explaining to her about how it was important for
her to eat at least 2 meals a day. However the idea of angering the gods by
eating regularly was just something she was not willing to accept. It is at
times overwhelming to see how people live their lives and sometimes frustrating
when they just lack the knowledge that you are trying to impart to them.
They said, this is what GOD wanted and how he wanted it.
Call it ignorance, blind faith or lack of education, illiteracy or superstition
– whatever may be the case – That day it made me wonder of what and who is GOD
to them. Who is he to us so called educated class? And how drastically the
definition changes from ours to theirs?
Some say, it is their illetracy that keeps them the way they
are, some say it is their attitude. But to me – my maid was just a simple,
clean hearted woman who was working really hard to support her family her own
self. Her attitude was fine, her deeds were good and her nature was kind. So
then why was life being so cruel to her?
Inspite of being a believer in this superpower called GOD, a
question that flashed my mind was, “WHO OR WHAT IS GOD?”
Is this the same GOD who treats each person differently or
is there is a different GOD for different people?
If he is just one – why are there different modes of praying
to him?
If he belonged to a religion – why would he treat different
people from that single religion differently? Why would he create castes and
sub-castes and that divide?
If he belonged to certain class of people – why would there
be different lives within the classes?
If there were many of HIM in a religion – then was one GOD
stronger than the other and was it necessary to please all of them. And even
after all this fuss of worship and fasting, why was he not doing things to
improve this maid’s condition?
Or is GOD just a punching bag for people to blame their
misery upon something?
We all know somewhere within that anything and anyone good
can be God! And that GOD resides within us. All true preachers and teachers
would always teach that the goodness is us would house our God. So then why the
different lives for different people?
GOD, Religion – different for different people, but if
goodness is GOD why do we need multiple religions? After all, all existing
religions only teach goodness if followed in the true sense.
There are no straight answers to any of these questions,
there is no single answer. Or MAYBE there is if we are willing to pursue the
ultimate truth. If you are willing to take responsibility for yourself and your
state of life.
In pursuit of this I have pondered and explored and the
mystery continues to unravel each day.
What if for once we stop blaming GOD for all the good and
bad that happens to us and for a moment believe that our deeds in this life or
the past(if you belive in past and future lives) are creating a blue print for
our future life/lives. What do we do to change our lives for the better? What
would each individual need to do to make things only better for themselves?
Does our KARMA in the current lifetime and past play a part
in our existence and quality of life today?
It is easy to live a good life, if you were fortunate to
born into a good family. If you have acquired a good life with your hard work,
it is good to cherish your success. But will this last forever? No one knows. Is
there any assurance at all?
Have we done enough to ensure a good life for us, if we were
to be born again?
Forget past and future lives – have we even done enough good
in the true sense in this life so as to reap its benefits towards end of our
life.
There is lots of potential for your mind to explore this
question and you will be amazed at the very interesting journey you will make
in pursuit of this ultimate truth. Happy exploring to each of you who chooses
to take this high road of life J!
