Monday, 6 January 2014

A different GOD for different people?


After 17 years of working in the corporate world, I finally made up my mind to take a break from my professional responsibilities.  It was not at all an easy decision but had to be taken all the same, for several reasons.  I wound up my responsibilities at work and became a full time home-maker. The first 2 months in this role were just perfect, when people started telling me how relaxed and happy I looked. It was a compliment indeed and I am sure my husband was happy to see me relax - something he has wanted me to do for a long while now.

But it became evident to me very soon, that although I was home, I could not stop this mind of mine from thinking, observing, gathering information, analysing things around me. So many years of work had ensured that my brain and mind would not be happy just relaxing and although I was out of the workforce, I had to be productive in my own eyes - for myself!

After taking it easy for 2 months, I realised that there was just so much to do at home. How did I manage this all for all these years, when I was away at work? I stretched and stressed myself, I compromised on so many things for my family and myself. But then most of us women and even men make these compromises, when we have to do what we HAVE to do. Even the traditional housewife who has been at home forever has perhaps compromised on so many of her ambitions or wishes either for the family or as a conscious decision to give her best to the family.

Then it struck me, that for a first few years after I had my son, I had some very good domestic help round the clock in addition to family support. And that indeed took so much burden off me.

 My dear maid Malti-She made so many parts of my life easy before she got married off and settled in her own sweet life of domesticity. I never had any maid who was able to match her abilities. Her departure was the start to my struggles in balancing a successful corporate life and keeping my home the way I loved it. But that struggle is over for now.

In my current bliss, I keep observing this maid community – Each of them a woman just like me – with a family to take care of and responsibilities at work. The biggest difference between “the maid”(replace any name with another) and me was that while I had a stable happy life with all good things and loving people in abundance - her life was a misery!  Their typical story was that she was the sole earning member of her house while her husband wasted away his precious life drinking and dreaming of bigger things, which he would force her to buy him.  She has children to raise, a husband to battle on a daily basis, battle the economics on running the show with the money she makes. And so many other survival related problems- some we can’t even begin to imagine. Very pitiful condition to say the least!

The more I observed, the more I began to sympathize with her plight. I would often observe that most of them worked from dawn to dusk but never felt the need to carry a lunch box for themselves. I decided that I would try to give my maid a small meal on one pretext or the other just so that she doesn’t go hungry all through the day. I started doing that. On one day it was a cup of tea and biscuits then a glass of milk another day. Then on another day1 she ate the rotis and vegetable that I gave her but refused food on day2. I asked her why to which she promptly told me that she was fasting on the name of some GOD or Goddess. Then the next day she said she was fasting again for another God. She could and would eat only on day 4!( and that too I am sure, that she would eat if I gave her anything to eat at all else would go hungry- a price she was paying for bearing 5 children who needed to be fed).  Now this really got to me. These women who slogged day after day physically, could not survive like this for long. I felt so angry, helpless that no matter how much I did for her, it was definitely not enough.

So I tried explaining to her about how it was important for her to eat at least 2 meals a day. However the idea of angering the gods by eating regularly was just something she was not willing to accept. It is at times overwhelming to see how people live their lives and sometimes frustrating when they just lack the knowledge that you are trying to impart to them.

They said, this is what GOD wanted and how he wanted it. Call it ignorance, blind faith or lack of education, illiteracy or superstition – whatever may be the case – That day it made me wonder of what and who is GOD to them. Who is he to us so called educated class? And how drastically the definition changes from ours to theirs?

Some say, it is their illetracy that keeps them the way they are, some say it is their attitude. But to me – my maid was just a simple, clean hearted woman who was working really hard to support her family her own self. Her attitude was fine, her deeds were good and her nature was kind. So then why was life being so cruel to her?

Inspite of being a believer in this superpower called GOD, a question that flashed my mind was, “WHO OR WHAT IS GOD?”

Is this the same GOD who treats each person differently or is there is a different GOD for different people?

If he is just one – why are there different modes of praying to him?

If he belonged to a religion – why would he treat different people from that single religion differently? Why would he create castes and sub-castes and that divide?

If he belonged to certain class of people – why would there be different lives within the classes?

If there were many of HIM in a religion – then was one GOD stronger than the other and was it necessary to please all of them. And even after all this fuss of worship and fasting, why was he not doing things to improve this maid’s condition?

Or is GOD just a punching bag for people to blame their misery upon something?

We all know somewhere within that anything and anyone good can be God! And that GOD resides within us. All true preachers and teachers would always teach that the goodness is us would house our God. So then why the different lives for different people?

GOD, Religion – different for different people, but if goodness is GOD why do we need multiple religions? After all, all existing religions only teach goodness if followed in the true sense.

There are no straight answers to any of these questions, there is no single answer. Or MAYBE there is if we are willing to pursue the ultimate truth. If you are willing to take responsibility for yourself and your state of life.

In pursuit of this I have pondered and explored and the mystery continues to unravel each day.

What if for once we stop blaming GOD for all the good and bad that happens to us and for a moment believe that our deeds in this life or the past(if you belive in past and future lives) are creating a blue print for our future life/lives. What do we do to change our lives for the better? What would each individual need to do to make things only better for themselves?

Does our KARMA in the current lifetime and past play a part in our existence and quality of life today?

It is easy to live a good life, if you were fortunate to born into a good family. If you have acquired a good life with your hard work, it is good to cherish your success. But will this last forever? No one knows. Is there any assurance at all?

Have we done enough to ensure a good life for us, if we were to be born again?

Forget past and future lives – have we even done enough good in the true sense in this life so as to reap its benefits towards end of our life.

There is lots of potential for your mind to explore this question and you will be amazed at the very interesting journey you will make in pursuit of this ultimate truth. Happy exploring to each of you who chooses to take this high road of life J!

 

 

9 comments:

  1. You have touched upon a topic that is so vast and unfathomable. Fantastic job bringing out all the points to ponder!

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  2. Very well written ashwini... This actually takes me back to an question my daughter had asked when she was 5. While I was with her making her go to bed, I told her that we should be thankful to god for all that he has gives us - a home, good food, family and also enough money. Some people don't have all of this. To this she asked 'so does this mean that people who don't have this are not thankful to god? ' and to this I had no answer....

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  3. Wow Ash,
    Very well written and indeed a beautiful topic. Though I think the question u raised "Have we done good enough......born again?" is a wonderful question we could pose to ourselves...At the same time I would say never ask this to your self..cause you may land up measure your good deeds. Good deeds are to be done...taught at a real young age, as our parents did with us as kids. People who question gods act do not believe in their own abilities or probably are tired trying and hence wait for gods intervention or miracles to happen. In the process they forget to see the small miracles happening daily in their own lives. For example you coming her life( ur maid) is a miracle sent by god. That 1 person who would care for her as she cared for many others. More then our actions...the relief they get by thinking that someone cares about them, is more pacifying and gives them the strength to go on for a few more days.
    Good work Ash...Keep it going.

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  4. Very well articulated Ashu....through our own routine existence, we come across different instances that show us how much of a privileged life we lead....The maid story is a typical 'Maid-in-India' story....and the sheer strength and courage of these women is amazing....the way they weave their way through life.. LOANS...for drunken husbands ( caring for them, when they need to be booted out), children (food, education and if they can eek it out...even entertainment) and if that were not enough....their aspirations ( painting their home, festival rituals and else)....When I see my own maid....I often wonder....how we engage for that one hour and then we revert back to two very different lives....and how grateful I need to be for the life I lead...At times like these...it just leads to one conclusion..."Count your blessings and do not abuse it."

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  5. Very well written, Ashu! Growing up in a family where religion was mainly an identity and questioning God and religion was encouraged, I feel like I have always been an outsider to religious beliefs and rituals. In my personal quest, I am at a point where I believe that ultimately faith is what gives one the courage to face difficulties, believing all the time that there is a higher authority watching and protecting you, and karma is what enables one to stand up and face the many curveballs life throws at you, knowing that no matter how righteous a path you follow, you will have to face your karmic undoing...thus leaving your faith intact.

    As Rashmi says (in her comments above), doing good for the sake of getting something defeats the purpose. As the Gita says, "do your karma, without a thought to the fruits that you will reap"

    The idea of "higher birth" as defined in Hinduism as a reward for a good past life does seem to hold meaning...I think for now, we should each be thankful for the life that we lead. As for those who are less fortunate than us, I believe if we each decided to do even 1 good deed a day towards someone, a lot of lives will be touched daily! something as simple as you asking your maid if she has eaten, probably makes her life more tolerable...giving a beggar on the street a cup of chai...I don't know, inconsequential acts for us that can amount to something to someone else. if we can all teach our children to just be good human beings, I believe they will be much happier!
    I love how you let your thoughts flow, Ashu! its really thought provoking!

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  6. Hey Ashu, great thoughts for inspiration especially that im planning to give a break to my professional life too...Sounds like fun but a true reality check of elements unnoticed when we were busy all these years with our career, that come to light when we slow down in the pace of our lives.
    The maid story is typical of all most maids in Mumbai. Feel sad for my maid too..mother of three and struggling for existence in a city like Mumbai..just to ensure good education for the kids.
    At this i would like to add what my mother in law would say when people riducled her for bearing 8 children that God sends the provision with every child. In this way she would tell me not to worry about how i could give the best to my children.
    About religious beliefs..i must say that the moment u begin to question the existence of God with a pure and not critical yearning, One definitely finds Him.
    As for me who doesn't believe in second birth, but that there is just one life and thereafter a life with the creator, for which goodness is mandatory.
    Please continue in the good u r doing already.. God Bless.

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  7. Hey - Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the subject. Thanks for taking out the time and effort to document them here, on FB and various other platforms that you shared with me. Feels nice to exchange thoughts on this subject. I caught some buzz words like - good deeds, higher birth, being good human beings and the vast and unfathomable amidst all the things....the thoughts just continue to explore broader horizons. Will hopefully be able to write another article on that soon.
    Take care you all.....

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  8. Hey Ashu good work looking forward for more articlrs .

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